I swear I was ready to eat the whole peanut butter jar tonight. It's totally clean, too much fat, but still clean. No sugar, organic, no preservatives and I was licking it off the spoon like it was toffee. So I made peanut butter cookies. Now the thing is I wanted to try something different, so I boiled some water, pitted 4 dates and added some boiling water to the dates (ran it in the magic bullet), added the pureed dates to the cup of peanut butter, I added some Roger's porridge and a bit of whole wheat flour. Popped it in the over (350F) for 9 minutes, and got cute little bite sized peanut butter cookies. I have to say I really did enjoy eating the raw batter of those cookies. For the next batch, I added some egg whites, agave, more whole wheat flour, baking soda and and the rest of the quinois we had from diner. I spooned this sticky mixture onto the parchment paper and topped it with a combo of chopped dark chocolate and cocoa nibs (for added nutrients). For tomorrow I'm going to try a black bean brownie sweetened with soaked and pureed dates (since they were out).
So It occurred to me, what the hell is going on with my body. It's like an alien has invaded. All I want to do is eat, eat, eat and crawl into bed. I'm moody, cranky and have very little patience. Then it bloody occurred to me, thanks to this blog here, that I was going through a very similar mood about 3 weeks ago. What is going on? Well I guess it doesn't take a brilliant scientist to figure out, wow I haven't had more than 3 full cycles in a row for the past 5 (going on 6) years. My body is truly messed up, but here it is. I am the most miserable ovulating woman I know. Which is so counter-intuitive it's silly. And made me chuckle out loud earlier today. I am really not used to hormone fluctuations and now that I know that it really does mess me up, I can try to make it better. I briefly did some reading and it basically said, limit sugar/gluten/coffee and get lots of rest and exercise. Well I do most of that, but now I feel that even if I didn't have a reason to be even more healthy before, now I do. I don't want to feel like this next month (or in 3 weeks) so I'm going to plan on eating much much better than I did this time around. Now that will work, unless I get pregnant.
So just in case you zoned out, I basically just gave myself a get out of jail free card this time Next month I'm going to kick this mood in the ass with good food and exercise. No more moping and eating peanut butter out of the jar.