Day 37: A Random Rant

Don't bother to read this.. (it doesn't flow well and might not make much sense). It's more a therapeutic way for me to vent my frustrations about my lack of energy and wild mood swings. And hopefully it can only get better from here!

I wake up tired, I am tired by 8:30pm and I don't want to do much in between.  Is it this bloody weather? I can feel my body starved for some real sun and heat?  How many day's has it been cold and cloudy around here?

Also my kids have all spontaneously become slightly deaf? It's like someone pushed the volume button up and then lost the remote.  They are all just a tiny bit louder and it is so irritating.  I can't even tell anymore if they are having an argument or actually just having fun!

My daughter literally walks in front door from school and crumbles.  Luke just has to look at her the wrong way and BOOM! the water works are out and drama is abound.  She is so tiered that for the last few nights her bed time has been bumped up by almost an hour and half.

The other day I caught Luke stepping on Patrick's head to climb the couch!!! Yes his HEAD???? what is that. Have they lost their brains along with their hearing?

Now me... what is wrong with me???  My morning program was canceled and I was so flustered that I couldn't form a decent plan.  I basically showed up at two of my friends houses begging for a play date (but of course... and to be expected they have lives of their own... and had other plans)... Now I'm totally mopping and sad for the rest of the ride home.   Then I get home and I start crying for joy because someone (Thank you so much Janet!) dropped off some clothes for me and I am eternally grateful. And the next minute I'm so angry that the dishwasher won't clean properly that I am practically having an argument with the dishwasher - and it's was winning because I'm in tears again!. Another incident today I'm calmly waiting in the Dr.'s waiting room; sure it was for a hour and half, I got a a good two chapters of a new book read (nice and peaceful actually) - then I can barely control my rage when I have to pay 4$ for parking (when the receptionist had accidentally put my file in the wrong spot so the Dr didn't actually know I was there).  Then later tonight Mark and I sit down and watch some old photo's and reminisce happily about the past, and somehow we realize that I've double booked something for next month and I lose it!!!  Why didn't he write it on the family calendar!!!  aghhh that's what it's for!  And now I'm not angry or sad or happy!!! I'm just so tiered!  Mark thinks Annaliese and I have been about equally ridiculously tiered and that perhaps we are fighting the same bug?  (surely she's not pregnant so that won't explain her mood swings and massive fatigue)...