Today we actually made it to church in time! And other than chatting with some other parents who have extremely loud kids, the other thing I really got out of the whole thing was "love your enemy'. Gakkk, how are you supposed to do that? First of all I'm not sure why my enemy hates me. (*rhetorical) I guess I can understand that everyone is a product of their past and can only do the best they can with what tools they have been given. I guess some people's tool kits is kind of crummy. But am I not, trying to build up a better tool kit? I'm trying everyday to learn about parenting with empathy, about health and wellness so that I can pass the best onto my children.
I am a firm and true believer in the "do better" philosophy. Why stay stagnant? Or settle. Good is ok, but better is just that, better!!! Sure it's not absolute, but it means that you are always striving for self improvement. I think that as long as you can appreciate what you have in your life and you are trying to better YOURSELF... and not your stuff! Do better, leads me to realize that "love your enemy", is a monumental task but it's something that I should strive for. I'm sure tons of people are always striving for something better, for me I can just add it to the list.
Can you imagine the piece of mind, the freedom to feel like you aren't a victim of someone else's hate. I mean a victim (in your own mind). We all have so much power within ourselves. We let our mind dictate what we should and should not do or say, what we are scared of, what physical limits we are comfortable with, and how we react to perceived situations. For example, "get off the computer and do a hand stand in your living room!, GO NOW!". What type of reaction did you get to that comment. What did your mind immediately tell you! - she's kidding, you can't do that, it's to dangerous, I'll fall and get hurt, is she nuts, does she want me stand on my hands???
Our brains are designed to protect us! Smart feature, if we are running from lions or trying to fight off hungry bears. But we live in a different time now, we don't have to be slaves to that automatic protection. Meaning "love your enemy", seems as stupid as "do a hand stand right now!", but it's kind of the same reaction that I'm having to it. My mind is trying to protect me from harm. My mind knows that if I engage my enemy, feelings will be hurt, tension and stress and inevitable. My mind knows it wont be easy and who knows what will befall. But sometimes you just need to trust in something right. Trust in the process of goodness. In my case, trust in God and in my "do better" philosophy. Step 1 of goal: facing fear and not go running in the other directions!
(ps, I tried the hand stand and got two feet off the ground but it wasn't pretty, just silly!) and now I'm smiling because of it.)