I am so blessed to have such an amazing group of friends. This morning I hung out with an amazing mommy friend, this evening I chatted online with a few awesome people and it couldn't have been more perfect. I absolutely needed these people in my life today. At one point this evening I was so down that I was about to eat a second piece of ice cream cake with my wine because of some crap but then a friend reminded me of something awesome. Even though I was upset tonight, I still found simple pleasure in cooking diner. I sauteed, and chopped and created a beautifully healthy meal for my family. Curious? Brown rice noodles with sauteed garlic and carrot slices, corn and spinach. The broth was the leftover from my lemon chicken soup and I also made spaghetti squash to mix in. Oh it was sooo good! The point is that I was present in the moments of cooking, even though I had forgotten about it. Friends and family can be such an asset in helping us cope with drama.
I couldn't actually read when I was dramatizing the stress in my head because I was driving. I had to get from point A to point B. I did try to think about the stress cycle and how every ounce of thought I kept putting into the drama, the bigger I was making it, but I couldn't shut it up. So what to do then. Give up! Throw in the towel, obviously I suck at the "no thinking".... OF COURSE NOT!!!! I am as stubborn as they get folks. I won't be down for long, and I'll come back up swigging. So what if I got something in the mail that upset me! So what if I blame myself for everything that has gone wrong in the past 5 years, so what if I think I don't deserve that amazing husband and kids that I have... screw it! I'm a fighter. Did you know I was a wrestler in high school and never lost a bout? Then I took up Jui-jitsu and only lost 1 fight to go on to win the regional championship in grappling. I am a fighter! I won't give up! I am stubborn to the point of stupidity! (ask my husband, he'll brake my wrist before I ever say mercy!)
Crap and drama is just that! I chose tonight to be grateful for my strength, for my friends, for my mom (who always lets me vent), to my rock (Mark), and to the lights in my life (my kids). I am so blessed. I have love, laughter and life!